When it was evening on that day, the first day of the week, and the doors of the house where the disciples had met were locked for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” After he said this, he showed them his hands and his side. Then the disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you.” When he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.” But Thomas (who was called the Twin), one of the twelve, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them, “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe.”
John 20:19-31
A week later his disciples were again in the house, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were shut, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.” Thomas answered him, “My Lord and my God!” Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe.” Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not written in this book. But these are written so that you may come to believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that through believing you may have life in his name.
My sermon from the 2nd Sunday of Easter (April 16, 2023) on John 20:19-31.
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About seven weeks ago, when the season of Lent began, the kids in Sunday School met inside the building to play with dirt. On the floor outside the church offices was a large tarp with a big bag of soil and several pink and green pots sitting on top. After talking a bit about the season of Lent and what it leads up to, each kid was given two small sticks and a bit of twine. With a little help from their parents and teachers, the kids crafted a Cross – and were then given a pot to fill. Once the pot was filled with dirt, each child then tossed in a bit of grass seed. There was much digging, pushing, and getting their hands dirty while making sure the seed was exactly where it needed to be. Once the planting was done, the Cross was placed on-top. The kids were thrilled they got to make something and couldn’t wait to see what comes next. But they soon realized how difficult waiting for new things can be. We often want to rush to the good stuff – to an Easter filled with daffodils, candy, presents, and joyous family gatherings. Yet getting to that point can be hard. And the waiting we do is often scary or boring or everything else in-between. I often find myself not sure what I’m supposed to do while waiting for what comes next. And I wonder what the waiting was like for Thomas after he heard about Jesus visiting all his friends – except him.
Now today’s reading from the gospel according to John is something we hear every year on the Sunday after Easter. Mary Magdalene, who – in John – was the very first person to visit Jesus’ tomb, had an experience no one else had. She reported to the other disciples that the door to the tomb was opened and when they came to investigate, they found Jesus’ burial clothes neatly folded where his body was expected to be. Everyone else returned to the city but Mary lingered in the garden where the tomb was. We get a sense that Mary’s waiting was exactly as difficult as we would imagine it to be. John doesn’t give us many details, letting Mary’s actions and words help our imagination to fill in the gaps. She, like all the disciples, were scared, anxious, and worried about what comes next. Some of them chose to stay locked in place while others probably made plans to leave the city. Others, though, didn’t even know if they had a home to go back to since they spent the last three years following Jesus. The waiting they did was full of prayer, tears, disbelief, and wondering if what happened to Jesus would also happen to them. Nothing about their waiting was passive since their futures were in flux, especially for the women and other vulnerable people who did the culturally dangerous thing of leaving where they were known to follow their Rabbi. Mary lingered and she waited. But then, in the garden, Jesus showed up. He called her by her name – and with one little word – everything changed.
Now we can see from the beginning of today’s reading that Mary’s story was momentous but the disciples were still being themselves. The door to their room was still locked and their grief, fear, worry, sadness, and confusion lived in that space. They were busy waiting but weren’t 100% sure what they were waiting for. But Mary’s words had, I believe, changed their waiting because, in the middle of that emotional, spiritual, and mental junk in the air – Mary’s story brought wonder, surprise, and hope into their world. They didn’t have her experience but her words had changed their story too. Something other than their worry and fear was now with them.
We don’t know, though, what Thomas was up to while Jesus was busy with everyone else. But we can imagine what he was feeling before Jesus showed up. He, like Mary and the other disciples, was scared, anxious, lost, and worried. Yet he, unlike them, wasn’t locked up in a room because his grief had already locked up all his emotions and thoughts. When he returned to the disciples and heard what Jesus had done, his response wasn’t disbelief. He, I think, simply wanted what they already had. He wanted Jesus to show up to him; to be so real that it made this faith thing worth it. Thomas wanted what we want: an experience that shows the promises spoken over us during baptism were not pretend. Thomas knew how to live with the Jesus he could see but he now needed to learn how to live with the Jesus he couldn’t. He, in essence, needed to do what we do everyday: meeting Jesus in a way that’s beyond flesh and blood. There’s a long tradition of calling Thomas a doubter since he had the courage to name what he wanted. I think, though, it’s much more accurate to simply call him one of us since we want our own experience of the resurrection too.
The life of faith is a life of waiting which isn’t always very fun. We wait for prayers to be answered, for guidance when every one of our choices feels wrong, and to know that we actually matter. This is a heavy kind of waiting that we do while living lives with their own joys, griefs, happiness, and sorrow. Thomas, during the week after that first Easter evening, waited for Jesus. But I wonder if his waiting was different since he heard a story he didn’t know before. There was now something else in the air that didn’t deny his grief but it promised that something more had a claim on his soul. His waiting was hard but he didn’t do it alone. Because even though he didn’t have their faith experience, the other disciples made sure he was included at their table. Their story and Thomas’ story were right there, mixed together in a room that was still locked in fear. Those early disciples didn’t do what we usually do: making the competition at the heart of our American story take over what we believe faith stories can be. Their table was big enough to hold whatever it was that people were waiting for. And when we gather together around Jesus’ table, we get to be like them: to share every one of our faith stories and how we are still looking to see him. We, because of our baptism and through our faith, get to be like Thomas, admitting what we need while, at the same time, being like Mary, and sharing when we have seen the Lord. We need to hear from one another when Jesus said our name and when we desperately need to touch his wounded side. These stories come in many shapes and forms, full of miracles and mysteries; visions from heaven and the kind of everyday love that looks very ordinary but is always so extraordinary. The stories and needs we share is often how God grows our faith because they assure us that we are not alone. Waiting in faith is one of the ways we live with faith since we are Thomas and Mary and all those who witness to the new story God is already writing. As we traverse through our ongoing wait with God, feel free to share your fears, doubts, worries, and concerns. Keep yourself open, welcoming, and nonjudgmental when someone reveals their walk with God. The story you hear or the words you share might be exactly how Jesus makes himself known. And while you might think such a story requires a miracle, it could also be fairly small such as noticing that the pot of soil you left outside; that you did nothing to care for; that was actually knocked over more than once; came to life when a few blades of grass appeared when Easter weekend broke.
Amen.