Pocket Sized Pastor*

Ever since I got engaged and started planning my wedding, I’ve started to realize that wedding news is everywhere. I use to not pay that much attention to it but you can’t open a magazine, turn on the tv, or look outside without seeing something wedding related staring back at you. I sometimes miss the good stuff. Luckily my fiancee finds it and forwards it to me.

Recently, at a wedding in my borough of Queens in New York City, one of the guests (who was the groom’s boss) became drunk, hurled a drink at another guest, accused the bride of fucking up the life of the groom, and told everyone that she’s been sleeping with the groom while toasting the couple. So what did the bride do? She’s suing her. The bride says this guest ruined her special day. Supposedly, after the toast, seventy guests were asked to leave the reception. And the bride and groom didn’t spend their wedding night together and she can’t trust her husband (though they’re currently living together). The bride really does think her groom slept with her boss.

That sounds like a horrible day and I feel for the bride and groom. Well, I mostly feel for them. What I’m really curious though is why were 70 guests kicked out of the reception? If this was really the work of one woman, why wasn’t she just removed? Why was a large chunk of guests kicked out of the reception? That’s what makes me think that there is much more to this story than the lawsuit contends. But, all in all, it just shows that manning the guest list, keeping a close eye on who you invite, and maybe keeping the alcoholics away from the bar is probably one of the better things to do at a wedding. I know that every guest loves and open bar but not every guest is good when confronted with one.

Dr Pepper sponsored a wedding. This is a brilliant idea.

My fiancee came to my apartment right when I was reading this article. I looked up and asked her if Diet Coke could sponsor our wedding.

She said sure but only if we got an Orange Soda brand as well.

My fiancee and I aren’t carbon copies of each other. I have an identical twin so I never grew up wanting to marry a carbon copy. When you already share DNA with someone, you already are familiar with having someone in your life who likes what you like, does what you does, etc etc. So it’s pretty obvious that my fiancee and I would have differences and soda is one of them. I drink a lot of it (I grew up on diet). She doesn’t drink as much. Our cola wars involve Diet vs Orange.

So if Diet Coke is reading this, if you can get Orange soda involved, I’d gladly let you sponsor our wedding. We’re going to be spending enough money on you for beverages anyways. And if you want to wear giant sumo suits and wrestle each other, I’ll delay my first dance with my lovely new bride to watch you fight it out.

The details for one of the stain glass windows at my church

Okay, to be honest, I didn’t really pick it. My fiancee did. When we first started talking about getting married, she said that I could choose when we’re “officially” engaged but that we’re getting married on April 10 so I shouldn’t wait until after that to propose. She picked that date (and I completely agree with it) because our church, Trinity Lutheran Church, is awesome during Easter.

The white linens and banners, the lilies all over the altar, the cross, the pulpit, the choir loft, and the streaming sunshine illuminating the stain glassed windows that cover the building – Trinity is perfect in April. It’s not only a national landmark, it’s also a testimony to the German immigrants from Lower Manhattan who emigrated to Astoria in the late 1880s and built their own congregation. It’s a beautiful old building outmatched only by the warmness, openness, and love of the people who worship there. I was a little considered that my fiancee’s family would want us to marry in Florida (where her entire family is pretty much located) but her mom would have none of it. In a church as beautiful as ours, it’s hard to not get married in it.

April 10th will be the Saturday after Easter next year. Besides the liturgical significance of having a wedding during the Easter season, the large amount of flowers and decorations means we will have to spend 0 dollars decorating the ceremony space. Rather than waste time organizing a space to fit our needs, we rather let the space be a character in our wedding in its own natural way. There’s no need to create something to fill a picture – we’d rather let each piece (and our church is a piece of our lives) fit into our wedding celebration. And, after the ceremony, we’ll take all the Easter lilies we bought for the church (10 dollars a plant!) and move them downstairs for the reception. Wham, bam, easy decorations ma’am.

My job is on the fritz at the moment.

Like everyone in the country and the world right now, my work situation is screwy. Two weeks ago, all the programmers at my company were placed on a 2 week unpaid furlough due to crash flow problems. Last week, on pay day, all sorts of madness happened. I’m a permalancer so I’m in a fairly delicate position to begin with. No benefits, no unemployment, and I have no idea when I’m gonna be paid or not. It’s not the easiest place to be in but it works for me, to some degree. Last week, come pay day, all the programmers (and the people who are still at the company operating at a temporary reduced salary cap) kinda freaked out. Some went in to pick up paychecks to be told that they were mailed (even though they weren’t). Others were confused. I just sat around and was pleasantly surprised to find that I did receive a check in a mail. I didn’t expect that.

Today, I discover that some programmer’s had their checks bounce. Others were told that their checks had been mailed when, in reality, they had not and they were instead being held because our boss “had a family medical emergency” or some such. One of my coworkers called me up today to talk about work non-payment stuff. I was walking home from the gym (I’ve been to the gym everyday during my furlough after avoiding the place for 6 months). It was raining. He asked me about my wedding planning. He’s been married for five years and has a little one in the oven that is due in a few months. I told him all our big stuff had been booked – the venue, the reception hall, the photographer, etc. We’re just waiting for a few months before we get busy with decorations and all that.

He knows my fiancee and I are going to pay for it. And with all the shenanigans at my work, he’s aware that money is just going to be a problem. But at the end of the call, he said something that I found very touching. He said that I have the rest of my life ahead of me to make money and that I should just enjoy the time with my fiancee now as much as I can because this only comes around once. He doesn’t mean go into wild debt to throw a party or anything. He merely means to not stress too much, to relax, to enjoy being engaged, and to look forward to getting married to my special gal.

In this economy, that’s good advice for every groom.